I’ve been thinking about this a lot lately in my quest to be a more godly wife. I’m working hard to cut out the obvious nagging and complaining, but is there a more subtle form? Are there things I say to my husband that send the message that he isn’t doing or providing enough? Besides the obvious words and tone of voice, am I perhaps showing displeasure in him through facial expressions and body language?
My husband is a hardworking man, and respected at his job. He’s appreciated and honored for his work ethics. But I need to evaluate what message he receives from me. Is he respected, appreciated and honored? Or do I make him feel like he can never make me happy? Never can do enough? These are hard questions. Questions I find myself pondering.
My desire as a wife is for him to feel the most cherished by me. To feel like all he gives is more than enough. I posted on Twitter and Facebook today about how unhappiness/dissatisfaction has more to do with our thoughts than our circumstances. We must take our thoughts captive.
Philippians 4:8 says, “Finally, brethren, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is of good repute, if there is any excellence and if anything worthy of praise, dwell on these things.”
I’d like to take liberties and change it up a bit for me as a wife: “Finally, wives, whatever is true of your husband, whatever is honorable in your husband, whatever is right about your husband, whatever is pure in your husband, whatever is lovely about your husband, whatever is of good repute in your husband, if there is any excellence in him and if anything about him worthy of praise, dwell on these things.”
I may have to hang my version of it in my home to serve as a reminder. My husband is wonderful, and I love him with a fierce passion. I want to catch these subtle ways of nagging or complaining that I know I have, and eliminate them. This might mean I have to ask my husband to teach me what things I say or do that send the wrong message, and then train myself to not do them. Tough to ask and then listen to the answers? Yes, but oh so worth the building up of my husband and the deepening intimacy to be gained.